People often cite marital unfaithfulness, whether that plays itself out in infidelity, abuse, or in other ways, believing God is "okay" with divorce under these circumstances. While I’m certain God gives us a “way out” by allowing for someone to leave their spouse in these cases, that does not mean God intends for it. Let me explain…
Jesus was asked virtually the same question by the Pharisees in Matthew 19. They said, "Is it lawful to divorce one's wife for any cause?" Jesus answered, "Have you not read that he who created them from the beginning made them male and female, and said, 'Therefore a man shall leave his father and his mother and hold fast to his wife, and they shall become one flesh'? So they are no longer two but one flesh. What therefore God has joined together, let not man separate."
Notice he didn’t address what was “lawful”? His answer addressed God’s desire – “let no man separate.” Of course, the Pharisees were up to their usual trickery, and had an ulterior motive. They asked a follow-up question: "Why then did Moses command one to give a certificate of divorce and to send her away?" Jesus said, "Because of your hardness of heart Moses allowed you to divorce your wives, but from the beginning it was not so. And I say to you: whoever divorces his wife, except for sexual immorality, and marries another, commits adultery."
In other words, it’s easy to ask for a divorce when the marriage is nearly broken. It’s hard to continually give your marriage back to Jesus day in and day out, especially if you feel like your spouse isn’t joining you in this process. The words, “I just can’t do it anymore,” have been spoken to me by hurt spouses countless times over the years. And they’re exactly right. They can’t. The natural person is incapable of committing themselves to another human being for a lifetime - even in the best of circumstances. But God is not about the natural. He is the Supernatural. And His desire is to work miracles in your marriage, in your spouse, and in you.
The road is hard, but the answer to the question is simple: “What God has joined together, let no man separate.” God is in the business of reconciliation, not division.
Are you (or someone you know) in a difficult marriage? Feel like you’ve tried everything? Feel alone in your efforts? I beg you to give your marriage back to Jesus. As hard as it is for you to imagine, God can work your marriage into a beautiful masterpiece. Trust in Him - He has a greater vision for your covenant than even you.
Awesome post. I have a Christian mentor who has an awesome visual... he has two buttons and one says MY FEELINGS and the other GOD's WORD. He always uses those with people to say which are you following? He also tells people when they indicate there are "issues" that is really just comes down to sin. We have have it and need to deal with it. He directly points that out and says are you willing to deal with your SIN? (or issues, as many call it!) That always seems to put it in perspective that it really is not about my selfish desires but focusing on God's Word and dealing with sin. any relationship can recover in being humble enough to focus on what is truly important and trusting God to be the focus!
ReplyDeleteThose are some great words of truth! We are so afraid of the word "sin" aren't we? It's amazing how we often try to convince people we don't sin, but yet praise the one who saved us from sin. I often consider this: the more we acknowledge our sin, the more glory is given to Jesus for saving us from it. The less we acknowledge our sin, the more glory is given to us/me for being a "good" person, and not in need of a savior nearly as much as others. What a farce!
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